Well, here we are. One last week. 16 weeks of blood, sweat, tears, and dealing with spouses and girlfriend (or pets) who “just don’t get it” have led to this. While 8 teams are playing for pride, 4 teams still have to bare it all in hopes to achieve the thrill of victory, or figure out what 5K to sign up for. Let’s do a quick playoff recap to see how we got here. Lets start with people who got nothing to play for this week

Winner’s Bracket losers

Cardi Lee (lost week one of the winner’s bracket)

Poor Lee, all that work to get to the playoffs. 7 straight wins for those not counting. It began to come apart at the seems at the same time Kareem Hunt’s season and possibly career ended. Running into Cherno Alpha didn’t help either as C.A. boat raced Lee from the get go and put up 137 points on our most improved manager . Three cheers to Lee

Chalupa Batman (Lost week one of the winner’s bracket)

Chalupa had to be feeling pretty good going into this (re)match after beating The Barenaked Clady’s in the final week of the regular season. Ross struggled out of the gate and got 18.2 points from is QB, RB1, and WR1 (and no O’Dell…. ouch). Time to rebuild next years team on rebuilt knees. Blow it up Rossy Poo

Dad Therapy (lost in semifinals of winners bracket)

The soft spoken father figure of the league went relatively under the radar this year and put together a solid season. He got one of the bye weeks to rest up and prepare. Sadly this is fantasy football, where a bye week makes it convenient for making a bracket only and has no benefit. Dad and Clady’s had a hell of a matchup that all came down to Alvin Kamara on MNF. Dad showed is eagerness on the waiver wire , picking up the Jag D/ST and Dalvin Cook. Those additions gave Dad 40+ points in the semifinal yet he still fell short.

GodHatesJags (lost in semifinal of winners bracket)

Tolmie had to be feeling good. #1 seed in the playoffs and was 3-1 in the last 4 weeks. Again, this is fantasy football and real football players don’t care about your team. Or maybe God does hate all things Jags related, as Zach got a total of 10.2 points from his RB2, WR1, WR2, TE, and D/ST. I cringed a little writing that last sentence. A tough pill to swallow, indeed

Loser’s Bracket winners

In the wise words of the late Al Davis, “Just win baby”.

Dude McNasty (Won first game of losers bracket)

The Dude and King Can were glued to a MNF match up between Seattle and Minnesota that held their fate for the 5K. The game itself was boring (21-0 Seahawks), but a late/meaningless two-point conversion from Tyler Lockett sealed Dude’s fate as he let out a sigh of relief (air that he was saving for the 5K). A meaningless win the following week, and Dude as a chance to end the season on a 5 game heater.

Idaho Bridge Nutless (won first game of losers bracket)

This one wasn’t even close. Ben got double digit production from all but 2 of his players in this match-up. He scored 114.1 points. By far the juggernaut of the losers bracket but all that gets you in a free Saturday morning sometime next spring (and not puking on Park Center blvd after slamming a 40).

Editors note: I’m glad Ben isn’t running the 5K because he would probably set a pace that no one could beat in the future.

Team Coman (won in the “semi final” of the losers bracket)

Our expansion teams were sweating this one out. Coman is determined to leave a legacy in this league, and it was looking like it could be on a sour note that his legacy would be forged. In a battle of expansion teams, Coman and Toy fought to the bitter end in what may go down as one of the worst fantasy games every to happen. Coman squeaked by Toy 48.8-46.8. Coman is thanking Matty Ice for his 25 point performance.

Side note: this match up saw a TOTAL of three players score double digit points

King Can (won in the “semi final” of the losers bracket)

Andrew vs Grayson. This was a rivalry that goes back a ways. As long as Grayson as been a live really. Andrew’s job as a big brother is to keep little brother in his place. This match was no different as Andrew beat is little brother by a whopping 68 points. NFL games start at 11AM (MST), this one was over by 11:15AM. Our defending champ gets to wear the jacket for another month or so.

The Master Rooter Toilet Bowl

We’ve got the newbie (Toy) vs a guy whose team became a self-fulfilling prophecy when he named is team “Bye Week”. Remember gentlemen, this is the shame game. There is no glory in winning* the Toilet Bowl. Loser runs the 5K after slamming a Mickey’s at the start line.

*Winner is actually the loser of this match up

Deuce Bowl II

This one kind of feels like it goes back a ways. Stokes vs Bigelow. 2 friends now enemies (for now). It all began with col de sac street hockey, and now comes down to this. Just remember boys, mom jokes are totally off the table….. I’m sure we will all be entertained come Sunday while watching this unfold at Burger N Brew (I heard Kyle knows the owner). Loser tries the first Rump-ma-gump?